Bats Afire

Minnesota 32, Chicago 14

That, ladies, gentlemen and Yankee fans, is not a Vikings/Bears score. It is the cumulative score of yesterdays' not-so-split doubleheader between the Twins and the Whine Sox.

In game 1, Scott Baker gave up seven runs in five innings, but added a shiny new "W" to his record because Chicago's Jon Garland, being the competetive sort, had to one-up him by allowing 12 in 3 1/3. The Chicago bullpen got in on the fun by coughing up 8 more, with the Twins bullpen close behind at 7.

Is it any wonder the game lasted 3 hours and 42 minutes?

In the game, the two teams combined for 5 homers, nine doubles, and a triple. The Twins chalked up 21 hits and 1 error, the Whine Sox 18 hits and 5 errors. (Wow, is that a record? Actually, no, but Chicago does own the record, along with Detroit: 12. Detroit committed 12 in a game against Chicago in 1901, and Chicago returned the favor against Detroit in 1903.)

Game 1 homer roll call:
3rd: Hunter, MIN, solo
4th: Kubel, MIN, grand slam
5th: Konerko, CWS, two-run
7th: Fields, CWS, solo
8th: Thome, CWS, solo

In the second game, Ron Gardenhire's worst nightmare came true--the starting catcher (Mr. Redmond) was injured after being hit in the head with a bat on the backswing, in the first inning no less. Meanwhile the backup (Mr. Mauer) was DHing, and there was no third catcher on the roster, thus creating the necessity for the pitcher (Mr. Garza, making his first start of the season) to bat for the remainder of the game. Garza was, you may be interested to know, the first pitcher to bat in an AL game since 1989. Despite not having batted in a game since high school, Garza laid down a sacrifice bunt in one of his three plate appearances.

Contrary to Gardy's expectations, the world did not end, the sky did not fall, and the Twins did not lose. (Although Redmond did need some stitches.) Indeed, with their pitchers batting the Twins romped to a 12-0 win.

Adding to the abundance of joy, Justin "Boom Boom Stick" Morneau hit three homers in game 2, the first time a Twin has done that since TBL was but a mewling infant. (Stop calculating TBL's age, that's rude.) The first of those homers was career longball #100 for everyone's favorite first baseman, and the game marked Gardenhire's 500th win as a major league manager.

(Also, props to MLB.com for using "thrice" in a headline. Literacy is a wonderful thing.)

Game 2 homer roll call:
1st: Morneau, MIN, three-run
3rd: Morneau, MIN, solo
Hunter, MIN, solo
7th: Morneau, MIN, two-run

Today, "You Can't Handle The" Boof Bonser goes up against Mark Buehrle at 2:55. TBL will miss most of the game on account of attending a wedding. (Stupid love, interfering with the important things.)

And finally, TBL will be running a special weeklong non-baseball event here on Third Base Line starting tomorrow.